16/05/2012 by Ann.

I was watching Nico Rosberg being interviewed on TV and he was the surprise winner of the China Formula 1 Grand Prix.

 He was asked what would be a nice season for him and he replied ‘To finish leader at the end’ or words to that effect and THEN he added ‘but that’s not realistic’.

 EEK!!!!

It’s important here to remember that you create your reality. Now people love to say that isn’t true (a kind of blame game or refusal to take responsibility) but if it wasn’t the case everyone would think the same way about everything. For example, it rains and some people take the view their day is ruined, while others thank the rain for saving them from having to go out and water the garden.

Think of witnesses in a crime – they all saw the same thing, yet their descriptions are not always similar because they each had a unique perspective and so they each created their own ‘real’ version of the event.

All being ‘realistic’ does is hold you back from achieving what you want to achieve. If Rosberg has the opinion that he won’t be leader at the end of the season then, quite simply he won’t, because for a start he lacks the belief that he can do it.

When you want to achieve something, you have to first of all know what that thing is that you want to achieve: you need a goal.

Then you need the desire to go and achieve it (and this is what stops most people – lack of desire). If it is only a ‘nice to have’ thing, then your desire isn’t strong enough.

After that you need to DECIDE that you are going to do something and take ACTION.

Nico needs a plan if he is going to bea serious contender for the F1 title and, to me it sounds as if he hasn’t really got one. Of course there are other elements involved, but, if he is not focussed on a goal and hasn’t decided to go for it, he has scuppered himself already.

So, how many times, when you are unhappy about something in your life do you say to yourself ‘Well, that’s reality’ or allow someone else to say that to you (I had a boyfriend who used to say that to me all the time – he was rubbish at taking responsibility for his actions).

Think about your life now and where you are stuck – are you really stuck or is that simply because you haven’t decided and taken action to change things?

Sometimes you need a ‘Kickstart’ (or kick in the pants!) to get yourself unstuck and so I have decided to offer a 90 minute one-off session to help you get out of the rut you are in. Just use this link to learn more and, if you really are ready to make a change, contact me and we will set up a time for your call and get you moving!

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31/03/2012 by Ann.

What did you think when you read the above sentence? Was it along the lines of:

 ‘No, I don’t’

 ‘It’s impossible to care too much’

 ’Caring means I am a good person’

Or something similar?

What if I rephrased it to the question ‘Do you care too much for other people?’

Because that is what today’s subject is all about.

There is nothing wrong with caring! It would be a sad world if we didn’t care for others and helped them out in times of need, or as a random act of kindness. What isn’t so good is when we neglect our own self care in favour of caring for others. We become slaves or martyrs to those around us and yet, our own lives become diminished in the process.

I know there are many of you out there who care for others, be it your children, elderly parents or similar.

That is all good. It’s also good to acknowledge that you too need to be cared for and, if you refuse to acknowledge that, it will diminish your own self-worth and then you are on the slippery slope to being a doormat for everyone else.

I’ve worked in care, I am a carer for my elderly mum along with my brothers. When I was doing both it became overwhelming and exhausting. My life was busy: busy doing but as to ‘being’ well that just went on the back burner. It doesn’t matter if you believe in god or class yourself as someone who is spiritual or if you have no belief at all, it is important that you value yourself and make self-care one of your priorities, because, if you don’t, then you are only living half a life.

Women are programmed to spend their lives on the guilt trip of caring for others as, for generations it was their role to do so. Even now the debate rages over stay at home Vs working mothers and it seems we really haven’t come that far in the way that we judge women for making those decisions in a way that we don’t judge men.

 We are still stuck on those old paradigms.

It’s back to the old metaphor or the plane and the oxygen mask: you put yours on first before helping others, as if you don’t you will suffocate and then who can you help?  In life we still seem to forget or ignore this lesson or we see people who look after themselves as being selfish and having ‘too much time on their hands’. Oh, and while we are at it, endless cosmetic surgery isn’t about self-care, it’s about low self-esteem.

What is your morning ritual? Do you take time to acknowledge the good things in your life and be grateful for them or do you run around after everyone else in the house before finally sorting yourself out? Do you get to work and then tell yourself off for not reminding your husband/son/daughter that the car tax/homework is due today?

Today think about how much time you spend each day doing things for yourself and then how much time you do things for others.

If it was someone else – what would you say to them?

Self care means a happier you: why would you deprive your friends and family of that gift?

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06/02/2012 by Ann.

When you look at how much money you spend, and I mean on everything. How much exactly do you invest in yourself?

I’m not talking about clothes, beauty products, shoes, jewellery or meals out: I am talking about your investment in your personal development.

I’m asking because, as you read this newsletter, I will be in the air on my way to Salt Lake City for David Neagle’s ‘Breaking Free Live Experience’.

I’ve taken a couple of David’s programmes in the last eight months and this is the first time I will be seeing him in person.

I must admit Salt Lake City is not the easiest place to get to from the UK and I will be spending more time at Denver airport between flights than is probably healthy, but I was absolutely determined to experience him in the flesh so to speak, as he has changed the lives of so many people.

Every since I began my coaching training I have invested tens of thousands of pounds/dollars on courses to expand my knowledge in all kinds of areas.

My latest purchase is in HBR (Holistic Belief Reprogramming, which is a form of EFT/Tapping) via the fabulously named Erika Awakening. I just love Erika; she is a no-nonsense kind of gal who, on her Facebook group, is great with the tough love approach and she won’t stand for any excuses! This means you have to step up and really take a good look at yourself – not always easy when your ego wants to run away from your issues. If you want to know more about Erika and what she does you can use my link to go to her website and take a look around:

https://erikaawakening.com/dap/a/?a=146

 In 2010/11 I not only did the David Neagle courses, but training with Kendall Summerhawk and Elizabeth Purvis and of course I am currently working one on one with my own coach, Lisa Farr, here in the UK.

Being totally honest, this was quite a push for me, especially as I spent so much time out of action with my injury last year and not earning any money, but it is important for me to keep developing myself in order to help my clients (and it isn’t only my clients – it helps with all my relationships).

 In the past I have worked for companies who spent little or no money on their staff development. What a loss to them and their staff. When I set up my own business I made it a priority to keep investing in my training, no matter what.

How much do you value yourself and how could investing more in yourself get you closer to a life that you love and the person you really want to be?

If you are stressed, anxious, worried or just generally feeling restless and in need of something more in your life, start taking action now and step up to investing in yourself.

Oh and by the way, saying ‘I can’t afford it’ is unacceptable. If you really want something enough you will find a way to afford it – how else do you think I managed to get myself to Salt Lake City?

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15/11/2011 by Ann.

I went to Wembley on Saturday to watch England play Spain in a friendly match. I took my friend Maureen as my brother was unable to use his tickets, so kindly offered them to me.

So, we watched the match, commented to each other on the play and the one goal and had a very nice time and went home.

Imagine my surprise when I read the newspaper reports the next day about the match: they bore no resemblance to the match we had watched the day before! The reporters were commenting on how well England had played to not only keep play away from Spain but ensure they had very few shots at goal. This was interesting as, from our view, England had tended to get the ball when Spain made an error or a bad pass. It seemed to us that it wasn’t England who were playing well but Spain who were playing pretty badly and the ball very rarely went into the penalty area at either end.  We were really surprised when England scored!

Of course it was  a great reminder about how we map out the world to our own personal viewpoints and so, millions will watch a match and there are just as many opinions over what exactly went on. All of these are based on our programming, beliefs and prejudices.

It can be very useful to reflect on your own standpoint, how it differs from that of others and what may have contributed to this; after all, there is always another point of view and it can be very useful to consider this in order to grow and develop.

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27/10/2011 by Ann.

Inpiration comes in all shapes and forms, but it is great to have someone to inspire you.

I remember when I was younger (and mad about horses) being inspired by various people. Ann Moore and her horse Psalm were my absolute idols and I was very lucky that she answered all my letters about her horses.

When it comes to transforming your life into a business that you love and which rewards you on many levels, who do you think of?

I have two people that I find absolutely fascinating: Paul McKenna and Anne McKevitt (strange they are both ‘Mc- something!). I find their stories absolutely inspiring as they have really transformed their lives.

Paul McKenna runs a very successful coaching and hypnotherapy business and has sold many CDs and books around themes such as ‘I Can Make You Rich’ and ‘I Can Make You Thin’. His work uses hypnotherapy as well as NLP techniques, and he has positioned them without any of the jargon. Instead has has relied on the results he gets by using them in his work with clients.

What I find fascinating about Paul is that I remember him from when I was in my twenties. Do you know what he was doing then? He was a radio DJ on a London station called Capital. He just disappeared one day and then, a few years later, was doing a stage act based on hypnosis, before transforming into one of the best known life coaches with many appearances on popular television programmes.

Let’s look at Anne McKevitt. Anne is a highly successful entrepreneur and philanthropist who has worked with top business people such as Donald Trump and Richard Branson and advised various governments. She also runs a millionaire’s club to take people to the next level. She resides in Australia and has mentored other top coaches such as Ali Brown.

Now I remember Anne as someone who grew up in a very poor part of Scotland and I first came across her when she was a presenter on a television programme called ‘Home Front’ which would do house makeovers.

Anne left the show to go to America and I heard nothing about her for years. In fact not until I was listening to a call with Ali Brown and heard Anne’s name mentioned. I went investigating what she had been up to on the internet and boy, was I impressed!

Despite their pretty humble beginnings, Anne and Paul have gone on to create amazing businesses around their passions and to earn millions from doing so. Now, I imagine some people cannot believe what they did and probably discouraged them from taking risks in giving up their earlier careers, yet they both were focussed and followed their path.

It is exactly the same for you and me: no matter where we are in our businesses it is important to know that we are doing what we want to do, and that we have to continue to do so and ignore the people who want to keep us in the place where they feel most comfortable.

Anne is my current big inspiration: she has let nothing stop her, not even a serious injury, and I keep thinking about her when I focus on what I want for my business. There is no one that I can think of that hasn’t had to face adversity and set backs in their business to get to where they are today (Richard Branson, David Neagle and Kendall Summerhawk are others that also inspire me).

Who is your inspiration for your business?

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26/09/2011 by Ann.

It’s tricky when you first get started in business; you often feel like a fraud and everyone, simply everyone, seems to know how to do it better than you.

Or do they?

Perhaps they are just better at acting than you are?

One of the best ways of developing confidence is acting ‘as if’. So, as a coach,  you would act as if you are the best coach in the world, or as Kendall Summerhawk suggests to her clients: ‘Ask yourself what a millionaire coach would do’. Just insert your chosen profession for the word ‘coach’ and see what a difference that makes.

The main thing to remember is that everyone had to start at the beginning; and that includes Richard Branson and Oprah. They had to learn how to run a business and made mistakes along the way, but they had the belief in themselves and the passion for their business to behave in a way that made the people around them believe that they could do it.

I’m going to be blunt here; women are great at apologising for lacking experience, talent, etc.  This is where you need to use a more masculine approach and focus on your talents and what you are great at, not focus on what you are not so good at. False modesty never made anyone a great success.

So, act as if you are already the most successful business woman/man in your area. If you are still struggling think of someone who you really admire and ask yourself the question ‘What would xxx do?’  By taking the emotion out of it, and focussing on someone else, you begin to feel and act in a more confident way and your belief increases which makes you more attractive to your prospects. It really is that simple.

Start doing that today and notice the difference it makes to you and your business.

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